Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life

Here we go: the sequel to the film that no one liked…

What is it about the titles for the tomb raider movies? The first one was called Lara Croft: Tomb Raider… strange, since in video stores all around the world you just know that everyone will keep it until T instead of L. And then the second one is called Tomb Raider: Cradle Of Life. Shouldn’t there be a ‘the’ there somewhere? I’m sorry, but it bothers me…

I should mention that I actually quite liked the first film. Whilst not a great film by any stretch of the imagination, I was thoroughly entertained. Plus it had that amazing shot. (You know the one, with a fur coat clad Croft and military entourage walking in slow motion with a huge chopper lifting off in the background, all to the sound of Nine Inch Nails’ Deep. Wow.)

This film, however, is a very, very, very poor sequel.

My first complaint: there isn’t enough tomb raiding in this film. In fact there is almost none. I thought the games were all about stealing artefacts from ruins? Most of this film ends up resembling a James Bond movie: people running around major cities with guns, jumping off buildings and not knowing who’s secretly working for whom. Gimme a temple, some stake pits and a golden idol and I woulda been happy.

Second complaint: no character depth. Now I wasn’t expecting much, but even an over-the-top supervillain like Treat Williams in The Phantom would have been ok. Apart from Croft herself the other characters are mere shadows of real people. They have no edge whatsoever.

I just can’t help from thinking that it would have been so easy to make this film better. So easy. There are even big things with claws! (Which I would have liked to have seen more of.) But alas they only feature for a very short time and we are given no explanation as to why they are there and why they do what they do. (Admittedly a deleted scene on the DVD does provide a short explanation.)

Oh well. At least Jolie is fantastic. And I don’t just mean just her looks. Her Lara Croft is fantastic. She might be suave and sexy most of the time, but at least she’s given the opportunity to display more human emotions and occasionally have a laugh. Similar to Halley Berry’s Jinks, she’s a James Bond who actually has fun in her job.